We are three weeks into the new year and there is still talk about the year ahead, making resolutions to change and make a difference in one's life.

Reflecting on 'resolutions', I wondered if previous solutions for positive changes in the past year were so off the mark that they had to be re-solved to create re-solutions for this year. This is done annually, making re-solutions in the hope of better outcomes.

Zen master Takuan wrote: To think during a fight meant certain death. The martial exponent had to be so adept that during a fight, each response is in direct relation to each strike, without thinking. A thought, he wrote, is an interpretation and impression of a past event that does not exist NOW. In fact, as soon as we say "NOW", it is already in the past. So holding onto a thought, or memory, is to dwell on the past that no longer exists.

To truly forgive, then, is to totally forget about the event. It never happened. This truly creates an opportunity that allows for change. For example, if something happens between a couple, and one party professes to forgive, then no mention or reference to the event should ever take place. As Aslan, in C.S. Lewis' The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe, said of Edmund's betrayal of his siblings: "It is in the past. Don't ever mention it again."

However, to most, the shadow of the hurt still lingers. The hurt, itself, is an interpretation of the perceived action. Then, how many would mention that past event as a warning to prevent its recurrence? To merely mention the hurt again does not allow nor recognise the change that may have already occurred as a result of the forgiveness. To children, reminder-warnings like this create the impression that it is expected to occur again. In the end, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. As parents we may say - I knew it, I told you so... why are you ALWAYS LIKE THAT... or something to that effect.

To have a re-solution that has been re-solved is only a thought, to embark on a certain plan of action. It is worthless without acting on the decision. I have been asked how I was able to achieve all that I have. I just quote Nike - JUST DO IT. People who have been successful in their fields did not just think about succeeding, they acted on their determination to succeed.

So, do I have a list of New Year Resolutions? Well, I do have a list of things I want to do this year - no resolutions. Every moment is new, every day is a new beginning. Decide on the solution, and just do it.

In peace and harmony,
Rafael Oei Sensei.
(© Copyright January 2006: Rafael Oei)

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